Caregiving is rampant in our society, yet it remains an unseen response to a growing problem. We know that the gray tsunami is upon us. Not only are the Baby Boomers aging, but our parents are still alive and living into their 8th, 9th and 10th decades. Medical science has provided treatment and technology to maintain life long after past generations of individuals would have died.
The caregiving is not only done on site. We are also caregivers when we live across the country from our loved ones. Every phone call that comes late at night causes us to have chills because of concern about an aging parent. What happened this time is always the thought when we get that call or text.
Approximately 19% of American adults are caregivers. AARP says that 75% of these caregivers are employed. That means that they are putting in a full day of work and then spending 20 hours a week as a caregiver. That is another part-time job. 70% of caregivers note that they have had to make accommodations in their work schedules because of their caregiving. Others make significant financial expenditures from their own funds to provide for the needs of their loved ones. Another 40% feel that they did not have a choice in assuming the caregiving role.
Caregiving also has substantial stress associated with it. This pressure comes from the responsibility of having your own life and family to look after and then the care of a loved one sandwiched on top of that. The physical and emotional cost of being a caregiver is profound. It shows itself in depression, withdrawal, feelings of failure and loss in your job and your life, weight gain or loss, insomnia and generalized exhaustion. Reach out for help. Keep your friends close by and use them to explore your fears and feelings. Do not expect more from people than they can deliver. Ask for what you need.
There are resources available that can help you tackle caregiving that will allow you to have your life back. Care managers, psychotherapists, Employee Assistance Programs and spiritual advisors can all help you get the balance back in your life. Remember, if you get ill and are not able to help your loved one you have lost the battle on both fronts.