An 88-year-old male who was a Veteran is still driving, golfing and bowling. He is a widow and the youngest of 7 children. He and his wife did not have children, and since his wife died, her family has lost touch with him. He lives alone. He is a fan of his local library and goes there daily to visit with the staff. The library staff notes that he is talking nonsense some days and he is demonstrating paranoia because he thinks that the police have bugged his home.

An attorney library board member is called and makes an appointment with the man. He does not know where his legal documents are. He remembers the name of an attorney who is contacted for access to his will which donates his estate to multiple organizations.

The attorney calls a nurse case manager who begins to work with him. The attorney and his physician feel he is delusional. The nurse case manager is named as his Agent under the Power of Attorney for Healthcare. The care manager supplies the trustee with his budget.

Several years into the relationship, the Trustee, who is out of State and has never met this man, decides that 92-year-old demented individuals do not play golf, bowl nor do they read the daily newspaper. The Trustee refuses to reimburse for these expenses.

The nurse case manager advocates for this man who continues to enjoy his active life and gets the newspaper off his porch each morning as he has for nearly 70 years. The nurse case manager writes letters to the Chairman of the Board and the Chief Executive Officer of the company. It takes multiple follow up calls.  Six weeks later, the case manager receives a call from a low-level employee saying that the Trustee will begin to reimburse for the expenses. There is a veiled threat to the case manager concerning monitoring to make sure she is not exploiting the senior.

Emil lived another 3 years in his home with systems in place to keep him safe as his dementia deteriorated. The nurse case manager visited him weekly, attended doctor office visits, interviewed and supervised home caregivers and managed his life. She was given the honor of providing his homily and was given the flag off his coffin at his funeral.

If you need assistance advocating for a loved one with dementia, please contact me for advice.